First, let me say, by *Cool Cat* I mean hip, as opposed to arctic–as in freezing temperatures. Myren, my chauffeur, thought I should mention this since he felt that few would associate me with anything to do with hip. We had a loud long discussion about this, but I won’t bore you with those details.
How would I know about cool? you ask. (Or I should say, Myren asked this very thing. Numerous times.)
Let’s say, I’ve had the chance to observe many of the cool-as-in-hip over the years. Sometimes I’ve even acted cool myself.
Why should I care? you ask. Everyone wants to be cool, I say. What planet are you from?
Here are my coolest handy hints!
Top 6 ways to be a Cool Cat:
Don’t use the term Cool Cat unless you travel back in time to the 50s and join a band of beatniks.
Or unless you’re referring to the old cartoon character based on beatniks from the 50s. Come to think of it, those beatniks were really cool cats.
Wear a beret. Preferably black.
Never smile.
Always wear sunglasses.
Get some bongo drums.
Wear black. Or black & white stripes.
Okay, so if you don’t want to be a beatnik from the 50s, maybe you can skip the bongos.
Now you’re asking “Can I be a Cool Cat in the 21st century without imitating some ancient-times goth-looking characters?”
Sure, I say.
Top 6 Ways to be a 21st Century Cool Cat:
Change out the beret for a baseball cap or knit cap.
Wear very baggy pants or very tight pants.
Get a tattoo or 4 or 5. Large and colorful ones.
Grow a beard if you’re a guy and enhance your hair and nails if you’re a woman.
Change out the bongo drums for the latest mobil with at least 479 apps.
Join a gym. Muscles are in.
Keep the sunglasses. Shades are forever cool.
