This week I’m on a Cheez-It kick. I love the crunch and the taste and the satisfying fullness after I eat half a box while watching the UConn Women’s Basketball team crush their opponents. Or while reading or listening to an audiobook. Or while talking on the phone. Or driving the car.
See the pattern here? I seem to be eating Cheez-Its any time I’m engaged in a leisurely activity. And have one hand free.
[This begs the question, perhaps, about how I consider driving a leisurely activity–and maybe I ought to keep two hands on the wheel. It also calls to question whether or not I ought to cut back on my leisurely activities. But I digress.]
I like Cheez-Its too much. So much so, that I’m wondering if the folks at Nabisco have invented some
magical ingredient that makes them magnetic, that draws me to the cracker aisle in the grocery store, that draws me into the grocery store when I’m driving by, that makes me leave the warmth of my home at night to go out and drive to the grocery store to buy Cheez-Its.
Maybe I should take a box to the lab and have the ingredients tested. I know what the label says, but I don’t see anything past the gazillion calories and bazillion grahams of carbs and the catrillion grams of fat that might make them magnetic. They left out the magic ingredient.
I can tell you one thing that’s not causing me to buy Cheez-Itz, it’s not those commercials with the stupid talking cheese.
Regardless of what makes me eat too many Cheez-Its, I need to stop. I’m not getting any slimmer.
Since I’m far from skinny, I need to do something about this terrible snacking habit. I need to get off the Cheez-Its.
Stephanie Queen’s One Easy Step Plan to Kick the Cheez-It Kick:
I will eat nothing but Cheez-Its day and night until I can’t stand them anymore and never want to eat one again. Here I go! Wish me luck!
NOTE: Surely you’ve all run into a snack kick, right? I’m not crazy, but I will need to buy a new larger wardrobe if this plan doesn’t work out, so I’ll check back in and let you know. I give it a week.
About the Author:
Stephanie Queen once worked for Keebler Company–a rival to Nabisco, the Cheez-It company–but this has in no way influenced her in her eating habits or insinuations that Nabisco created a magic cracker with magnetic powers. Ms. Queen has long since left her Keebler Cookie job and turned to writing. She writes romance novels and sometimes she writes humorous blogs. Or blogs she finds humorous and amusing to write. Humor her.